Crack-Fic I Wrote in Seventh Grade
by demoma'am
Summary: My friend and I had the grand idea of writing a Naruto/Vocaloid crossover fic when we were 12. I wrote most of the Vocaloid parts, she most of the Naruto parts. Honestly I don't know how to feel about this. Please, for the love of all that is holy, remember that we were twelve when we wrote this. Basically, there's a Vocaloid school and the Naruto characters are transferred there.
1. Chapter 1

_He was leaping through the clouds, chasing after the rainbow PopTart cat, nearly tripping and falling flat on his face every five steps. His jacket trailed behind him as he picked up speed, being careful not to slip in the pudding puddles caused by the toast puppies._

" _No, wait!" he cried, sobs muffling his speech. "I want to love you!" He sank to his knees as the PopTart cat circled around, nuzzling its cheek against his-_

 _RIIIIIIIING!_ The alarm clock screeched its glorious song of its people, rattling off the table in the process, startling the slumbering male out of his dream world. The bed groaned under the pressure as the figure sat up. Stretching, he picked up the alarm and hurtled it across the room and into the wall, the ringing stopping abruptly.

After getting dressed, the young man looked in the mirror to comb his chair, making sure to make the white streaks on the sides shine. He then grabbed the pocket watch from where it was laying on the side table, shoving it into his leather jacket's pocket. He dusted off his stiff khakis and finished buttoning the school uniform's shirt. He often enjoyed leaving the top few buttons popped open, for he believed this helped attract girls. It was often to no avail, though.

"Alfred Jones, ready for the first day of school," he declared confidently. Not that he was excited for school, it was just school. He sighed, taking the stairs down into the kitchen to have breakfast.

Alfred, nicknamed Big Al for his height and unnatural strength, didn't ever expect any responses to his common outbursts, but he couldn't help it. It always got too quiet, what with living alone. After scarfing down some PopTarts, he headed out the door to meet Gakupo and Kaito, his two strange but loyal comrades, for school.

His phone chirped as he was running outside his door, the crisp autumn air chilling him. He fumbled for his phone frantically, trying to not drop it and crack the screen- again. "H'lo?"

" _Ohayo,_ Big Al," the voice on the other end cried. _Gakupo._

"Hey, Gakupo. What's up?"

"Are you almost here? Kaito won't stop bugging me about ice cream."

"Yeah, I'm getting there… Slowly. No point in rushing- we still have a couple hours."

In the background, Al heard, "Kaito! Stop messing with my backpack! I told you, I don't have your ice cream!"

 _Backpack._

…

"CRAP!" Big Al rushed to his house, slamming through the door, searching for his backpack, looking in every nook and cranny possible. Eventually, he found it, right where it was supposed to be- hanging on the back of his bedroom door. He swore under his breath, then bolted back out the door to join Gakupo and Kaito.

The three boys liked to make it to school early at the beginning of the years in order to catch up with friends that had been away on vacation for the summer, snag some snacks from the vending machine, or organize their lockers to avoid hassle… Not that they were very tidy, but wasn't that the point?

Kaito, now happily eating his favored ice cream that Gakupo had in fact hidden God-knows-where (it was nearly impossible to hide ice cream, since Kaito always seemed to find it with ease), twisted his scarf in between his fingers absentmindedly as he sighed, "I heard there're going to be some new students this year, guys."

"Really? We never get new students. The Academy's really picky about who it accepts. Who did you hear a crazy rumor like that from?" Gakupo raised an eyebrow at the blue haired teen.

Kaito shrugged. "Miku-chan told me."

" _Miku_?" Big Al scoffed. "Why would you believe her?" Miku was the most annoying girl in the school- at least in their opinions. She was that one popular person in the pile of smelly losers who the teachers adored but everyone else knew was a butt. She had her few "followers", the ones who heeded her every command and had to stay a few feet behind her at all costs. Oh, well. Every school had to have one of them. "Well, even if there are new students, that means new girls. Right?" His lips twisted into a smirk as he instinctively unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt.

Gakupo and Kaito rolled their eyes, plenty used to their friend's behavior around girls. They were already preparing to comfort him after he crashed and burned. They turned onto their school's street and made their way through the already gathering crowd of high schoolers swarming around the commons area. Al was typically the tallest of them all, being the only American at the school. He sort of liked being the oddly ginormous one- it proved well, especially since it bought him the ability to be on every sports team offered at the Academy… But he didn't necessarily want anything to do with sports. He parked himself into a plush chair beside a coffee table, waiting for Gakupo and Kaito to join him.

"You're seeming to forget you take much longer strides than us, Big Al," Gakupo grumbled, brushing his long purple hair out of his face.

Al smirked, as he always did when the people at the school mispronounced his name. Another advantage for the Americans- they had "L's". "Well, you're seeming to forget I'm freakishly tall."

Kaito laughed as he plopped onto the chair's arm next to Al, pulling out a book to read.

"See the new people anywhere?" Gakupo chirped, sitting on the other arm.

"What do they look like?" Al asked.

Gakupo gave the "seriously?" look to Al, saying, "We practically know everyone at the Academy. I'm sure we'll realize a new face when we see one." He sat back against the back of the chair.

They sat for a while, keeping their eyes peeled for new and old faces.

ヽ( ⌒o⌒)人(⌒-⌒ )v ヽ( ⌒o⌒)人(⌒-⌒ )v ヽ( ⌒o⌒)人(⌒-⌒ )v

"Old habits sure do die hard," muttered a brunette to her reflection in the full-body mirror.

Of course she would wake up at five in the freaking morning when her new school didn't start until nine, it was only six-thirty, yet she was already prepared and ready to go. Well, almost ready anyways; she'd fashion her hair into her signature panda ears when it got closer to school time.

The brown eyed girl tugged at the hem of the plaid skirt she adorned, her face contorting into a look of slight disgust.

 _Why did I have to get into the only Academy that forces you to wear a uniform?_ she wondered to herself while pulling up the mandatory ivory socks to cover her ankles. Huffing slightly, she crossed her arms and glared at her reflection once more, "Stupid uniforms… so uncomfortable."

Silently, so as not to wake her three flat-mates, she made her way to the kitchen, pouring a bowl of cereal for herself and leaving the box open on the bar top.

"Dumb rabbit… the cookies are this way, stupid," the girl mumbled, stabbing at the box with the butt of her spoon. Oh, how she wished she were back in Konoha, at her old school, with her old friends. Finishing off the remaining bits of cereal, she dumped the bowl and spoon into the sink carelessly, flinching slightly at the loud clattering sound it made.

She tiptoed into the bathroom, grimacing at all the pink items her friend Sakura had strewn across the counter. The girl loved pink. Her clothes were pink, her luggage was pink, heck, even her _hair_ was pink!

Three days and the apartment was already filled with make up and other girly things. The brunette glowered down at the container of eye-shadow that had been thrown on her side of the sink; she contemplated flushing it but realized that Ino would probably get back at her for it later.

She did not want to be the victim of one of Ino's "makeovers".

Skillfully and without much effort, she fixed her hair into twin buns on either side of her head, tying a strip of red ribbon around each. She placed her hands on her hips and winked at her reflection, "Looking good, as always, Tenten!"

Sneaking quietly back into the room she shared with her best friend, Hinata, she scrambled around looking for pencils, notebooks, anything that the other girl might have left lying on the ground. The shy girl may have seemed organized at first glance, but she was the messiest person Tenten knew aside from a certain energetic, blue-eyed, blond.

She gathered up her findings and shoved them into her black messenger bag with gold Chinese print on it, pulling her earbuds out and filling the empty space with a pack of black liquorice. She slung the bag over her shoulder and plugged her headphones into her iPod, selecting the song _'Aiyaa Four Thousand Years'_ to listen to for the time being, then pressed the shuffle option.

She searched the bag for her keys and tiptoed to the door. She might as well go early, to explore the school before classes started. She slipped out the main exit and pushed the key into the lock, swiftly locking the door behind her.

"Now… which way to the Academy?" she wondered aloud, trying to recall the directions Tsunade-sama had given her. She still couldn't believe that the woman had forced half of the second-year high-school students to attend the prestigious Academy; why couldn't they have just stayed in Konoha? The thought made her more than a little angry, though she was thankful that her friends had been chosen to attend also. She and her classmates had been training to become shinobi; it happened to be a very popular career choice in her home town.

Tenten drummed her fingers against her thigh as she walked, Kaida Yuki's singing soothing her nerves slightly. She had wanted to bring a kunai with her, she loved the feel of the cold metal pressed against her palm, but Hinata had advised her that that might not be the best idea. The brunette sighed, blowing a stray strand of hair out of her eyes as she continued briskly walking in the direction she hoped the school was in.

During her walk she took in the sights around her; the quaint little shops and houses lining the road, a group of children playing ball in their yard, it all seemed so peaceful. _Well, that'll change when Naruto wakes up,_ she thought with a snicker. The blond had a knack for causing mischief and trouble wherever he went.

She hadn't realized that she'd reached the school until she was shaded completely by the shadow it casted. Tsunade-sama wasn't kidding when she described the building; it was _big._ Gulping slightly, Tenten steeled her nerves and strode towards the school, her grip on her bag subconsciously tightening. Making her way up the stairs to the large doors, she gripped the left brass handle and gave a slight tug. It didn't budge; she pulled harder and harder, jerking at it with all her might. When the realization finally hit her, she wanted to slam her palm to her forehead. Of course it was locked, and, of course, she had just made herself look like a complete _retard._ This time, she let her forehead and palm collide.

Gakupo's hair swished as he quickly turned his head to see what all the ruckus outside was about. He could've sworn he heard some kind of banging…

"What're you looking at?" Big Al grumbled, looking in the same direction.

"Z-Zombies?!" Kaito gasped, ducking behind the chair.

"No, you idiot. Why would the zombie apocalypse just suddenly spawn upon us?" Al sighed, getting up from his chair and straightening his jacket's collar. His hand instinctively fell to the pocket where his golden pocket watch was, making his way to the main doors.

A girl stood there, glaring at her reflection in the glass doors, not noticing his approach. Well, she didn't look frustrated at all. He placed his hand on the door handle, pushing the heavy door open. "Hey, havin' door problems there?" he asked with a heavy American accent.

Tenten frowned up at the boy in front of her, he was at least over two heads taller than her, slipping into the building through the now open door. Doing a quick once over, she noted that he looked like one of those 'players' that Ino always talked about, and frankly, she did not feel like talking to someone of _that kind_ right now.

"No, no I'm not. In fact, we were just having the most lovely conversation about dense men knowing when to speak and when to not," she replied, her voice dripping sarcasm. She brushed past him without uttering so much as an _'arigato'_ and glanced around.

Big Al, clearly not expecting the girl to just pass him by, stared at her as she walked off. _Guess the popped collar doesn't work, after all_. He didn't intend on letting her vanish without knowing her name. "Oi, girl!" he yelled, hoping she wouldn't just pick up her pace.

"Al, shut up," Kaito called from his and Gakupo's seat. "It hurts to watch you even try."

Al rolled his eyes and walked back to the chair. Most likely, she'd be in at least one of his classes. They looked about the same age. But who could tell? She was quite a bit shorter than him.

The brunette scowled, there wasn't any kind of map thing to tell her where to go. She needed to find the principal's office; Tsunade-sama had specifically told each of them to do this when they made it inside the building. "Great, looks like I have to ask someone for help," Tenten sighed, slouching a bit more.

"Maybe if I just keep going straight…" She knew her sense of direction wasn't the best, but it was better than asking some random stranger for help. Tenten didn't need help with anything! ...Except art; she sucked at art. Usually Hinata would be accompanying her and the two would find their destination together, but not this time. "I'll just keep walking," she murmured and trudged down the hall.

As Tenten walked down the hall, a door swung open to her right.

"Aiyah!" she squeaked, dodging the wood and instinctively landing in a fighting position, brandishing a stick of liquorice as her weapon.

Another girl, teal pigtails dangling down to the ground, appeared in the hall, eyes wide at the now battle-ready Tenten. She placed a hand on her hip, making her way too short skirt swish. Another head popped in through the doorway, following the blue-haired girl. Her hair was black, adorned with a vibrant blue streak through her bangs.

"Uh, who are you?" the first girl sneered, obviously becoming angry at the fact Tenten looked ready to fight her.

The girl beside her rolled her eyes. "What's your deal with new people, Miku?"

Tenten gazed wearily at the two girls who had suddenly joined her in the once empty hallway. "Watch it, Priss! I've got liquorice and I'm not afraid to use it!" she cried, not realizing how ridiculous her last sentence sounded. Looking them up and down, she quickly accepted that they weren't a threat and stuck her "weapon" in her mouth, standing from her battle pose. "I don't have to answer that," she stated, the black candy bobbing in the air as she spoke.

"Well! I can't accept-" the girl so-called Miku exclaimed.

"Oh, would you hush?" her companion groaned, digging her hands into her pockets. She seemed to have been able to get away with wearing pants rather than a skirt, something all females attending were supposed to wear…

"Ruko, I can't just let this girl run me over like-"

"It isn't your job to complain about people running you over or ignoring you… That's Al's," she smirked. She turned towards the newbie and asked coolly, "So, you're new? I heard we were getting new students this year, but I couldn't be for sure. I'm Ruko." She stuck her hand out awkwardly in front of Tenten, expecting a handshake.

Tenten stared at the girl, "You're cool. I like you; name's Tenten." The brunette simply glanced at Ruko's outstretched hand, finally slapping it in a low-five-ish way. "Yeah, I'm new. A bunch of my friends are coming later, I bet they'd like you," she said, grinning. The brown-eyed girl reached into her bag and pulled out the pack of liquorice, holding it out. "Want a piece?" she inquired, head tilted slightly to the right.

Ruko reached for the bag, grabbing a piece of licorice and popping it into her mouth. "Thanks. Welcome to Vocaloid Academy- the happiest school on earth. Most of us just call it that Big-Butt Academy That Matches Nothing Else in This Town, though. Can't wait to meet your friends. There're some other people that I can stand running around the place somewhere…. I can introduce you to them all later, if you want." Swallowing the candy, she turned her head to meet Miku. "See, that's how you make friends."

Miku flushed angrily and spun on her heel with a "Hmmph!"

Ruko shrugged and placed her hands back in her pockets.

The brunette shinobi in-training watched Miku in amusement, trying to hold back a snort. She turned to Ruko, popping another piece of her black candy into her mouth, "By the way, do you know where the office is?"

"Yup, go down this hallway, turn to the left, then another left, right, then another left. Should be down the hallway once you do that." She grinned like it was the simplest thing in the world.

Tenten flashed the girl a thankful wink and bolted down the hallway. _Crap, what am I even supposed to say?_

Ruko waved slightly as she turned to deal with Miku, then strutted out into the commons area. She could be heard mumbling to Miku, "Miku, you need to learn that if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all…."

"Left, left, right… ugh, what was it? Left or right?!" Tenten gripped her head in her hands overdramatically and sank to her knees. "I don't remembeeeer!" She held out her index and middle fingers, prepared to do 'Eenie Meenie Miny Moe' but let out a frustrated growl and chose a random direction. Which happened to be the right direction, fortunately.

"Ah-ha!" she cried, spotting a plaque that read 'Principal's'. The brunette raced towards the door, slightly winded as she skidded to a halt in the doorway. The secretary glanced sideways at her, shooting her a strange glare. " _Gomen' nasai!"_ Tenten apologized hastily. "Um… I need to speak with the Principal, please," she requested politely and the secretary nodded towards the door in the far right corner of the room.

Tenten bowed slightly and hurried into the room; she only had about thirty minutes before classes started and she still needed her schedule. The chocolate-eyed girl knocked on the door, ignoring the fact that she was already inside the Principal's office.

"Come in," came a high-pitched voice. Tenten took a hesitant step towards the desk, eyeing the glitter covered person behind the object carefully. The Principal had bright scarlet hair and strange lilac orbs hidden behind round glasses. He wore an extremely glittery, salmon shirt tucked into his slightly less glittery, ebony slacks; a purple cross hair pin clipped in right above his right ear. Yes, _he._

Tenten could feel her eye begin to twitch as she tstared at the man. "Can I help you?" he drawled in a sickeningly sweet voice. The brunette shook her head to clear the thoughts that were creeping into her mind and coughed, "I'm new, I was told to see you about my schedule."

The man's eyes widened and he giggled, "Ah, yes! One of the transfer students?" Tenten nodded. "Let me see if I have it," he started as he began rummaging through a stack of papers. "What's your name, young lady?"

"Tenten."

"Tenten…?"

"Just Tenten."

The Principal scratched the back of his head, "Alright then, Tenten- _san_ …" He pulled a crisp piece of white paper from the stack and held it out to her, "Here we are!" Tenten internally cringed at the sing-song tone in his voice.

" _A-Arigato,_ " she replied, gingerly taking the sheet into her grasp. "Have fun!" the Principal chimed as she slipped out of the office. The girl sighed in relief as she walked back into the hallway.

"Alright… time to find these classes!"

Al rapped his fingers on the top of his desk, already tired of school- and it was only the first few minutes into the day. He sat up straighter and glanced around, trying to see who was in his homeroom class this year. _Gakupo... Len... Teto..._

"Pssst!" came a voice from behind.

Big Al turned in his seat to see who had made the noise.

"Yo, Al!"

"Ah, Ritsu, haven't seen you since last year!"

Ritsu Namine flashed a playful wink towards Al. "Nah, got caught up visitin' family and stuff."

"That's understandable."

"Mmhmm. Hey, they're actually letting me wear a skirt this year!"

Big Al raised an eyebrow at his friend, a bit weirded out. "Oh, really? That's a surprise."

Ritsu grinned, flipping his luscious, ruby red hair. Ritsu was, in fact, a crossdresser, and it came as a shock to Al that the Academy was allowing Ritsu to wear a skirt.

The two chatted for a while, not noticing the time. "Hey, where's the teacher?" Len sighed. "It's been ten minutes..."

"Weird..."

The door slid open and in walked a short(ish) girl with dark brown hair fashioned into twin buns on either side of her head; her nose was practically buried in a piece of paper. She tapped her foot, looking around the room and double checking to make sure she had the right class before sitting down in a seat near the front. She pretty much slammed her head into the table as her arms fell to her sides.

The door clattered open once again and another girl with long pale blonde hair flounced in. "Humph… these people all look so boring," she declared, tossing her blonde locks over her shoulder. The brunette's head immediately shot up upon hearing the voice, and she shot out of her seat, glomping the girl. "INO!" she cried, smothering said blonde and causing her to shriek.

"Tenten! What the-! Get off me!"

"I _know_ you! Yay!"

"I know you too, unfortunately… Now get off!" she squeaked, shoving her assailant off herself. Both girls straightened themselves out before sitting in two seats next to each other, striking up a conversation.

Gakupo leaned over towards Al. "Hey, isn't that the poor girl you tortured earlier?"

"Oh, it is! The chick beside her's cute..." Kaito sighed.

Gakupo rolled his eyes- again. "Well, there're two of the new people. Wonder how many others there are?"

"Who knows?" Big Al rested his head on his desk. "I'm bored..."

"Well, maybe the teacher will come soo-"

The door slammed open and a loud voice filled the classroom,

"INO, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DITCHED ME!"

Said blonde turned towards the door to see an angry boy with wild brown hair and strange, red, triangle marks on his cheeks; there was an awkward bulge in the jacket he had zipped over his shirt. "JUST BECAUSE WE SAW GAI- _SENSEI_ -" he started to yell when the door was, once again, opened rather harshly.

The boy yelped and dove out of the way as a man in a green jump-suit struck a pose in the doorway. "Kiba, you're such a wuss," Ino snickered as the boy glared daggers at her; meanwhile, the man at the door strutted to the front of the room.

"G-Gai- _sensei_?" Tenten choked, blinking her eyes repeatedly to make sure she wasn't imagining things. She wasn't, but she wished she were.

"Ah! Tenten, my youthful flower!" the man gushed, his abnormally bushy eyebrows raising and his eyes widening. "I'm thrilled that you're in my class!" Ino, Kiba, and Tenten gaped at the man.

" _Your_ class?!"

Gai struck his signature "nice guy pose", "That's correct!"

"Well, this doesn't look good," Al grumbled. _He looks like a frickin' nutcase._

" _O-Ohayo_ , _sensei_!" Teto attempted to greet the teacher, but to no avail.

"This year's gonna be great..." Gakupo groaned.

"Well... This is only homeroom. I'm sure there're saner teachers?" Ritsu groaned.

"Hopefully," Big Al agreed. He lay his head back on his desk, exasperated.

Gai glanced around at his students. _They don't have much enthusiasm,_ he thought to himself. _But! That will soon change!_ The ebony haired man gazed up at the wall clock, snapping.

"Alright! I will give you fifteen minutes to do as you please; after that we're all going outside for morning exercises!"

Tenten moaned, faceplanting the desk for the second time that day. "Ino… this is just awful.."

Ino _tsked_ and twirled a strand of her pale hair around her index finger, a look of boredom on her face, "Tell me about it! What am I supposed to do in fifteen minutes without makeup or a mirror?"

Kiba snorted, "Insult some girl's fashion sense or hairstyle? That usually cheers you up…" Ino stared at him as if that were the best idea she'd heard all day. Gazing around the room, she spotted her victim one seat behind her and to the left. Throwing an eraser at the purple haired teen to gain their attention, she blinked in a confused manner as she succeeded,

"Why are you wearing a boy's uniform?"

"Hnn?" said purple-ette grunted, turning his head towards her? "What is it?" he replied in his deep, somewhat nasally voice.

The blonde's baby blue eyes widened and she began to fan herself with her hand frantically, fumbling for words, "Y-You- boy- and- hair- but your voice and- WHAT?"

"What about it?" Gakupo glared at Ino. "A guy can't have gorgeous purple hair?" He sighed,

pushing the hair out of his face. "The world is a strange place, huh?"

Ritsu snickered, remembering how many times he himself had said that.

"Well, it's part of the samurai way, so deal with it."

Ino crossed her arms at a loss for words. Tenten snorted next to her and Kiba hid a smirk.

"Yeah, w-well… you look gay!" Ino cried, sticking her tongue out childishly as Tenten cracked up. "That's the best comeback you could come up with?"

The blonde's face was dusted by a bit of pink at this point, "Shut up, Tenten!" This time, it was Kiba who began to laugh. "Man, you really suck at comebacks," he choked out, trying to catch his breath. Tenten patted her friend's shoulder, "Don't feel bad! It's okay that everyone, including Hinata, is better at retorting than you!"

Ino growled and whacked the brunette with her notebook. "Ouch!" said girl squeaked, causing the blonde to chuckle. "I'll strangle you in P.E. later," the brown-eyed girl replied, glaring.

"I'm sexy and I'm proud of it," Gakupo retorted back, purposely flipping his hair with flamboyance.

Al smirked, "Nice one, Kamui."

Gakupo sighed. "I try."

"What do you think the teacher meant by... 'Exercise'?" Len asked, hopes faltering a little.

"Probably exactly what he said. He doesn't seem too right in the mind to me." Al crossed his arms, gazing at the clock.

 _Six minutes..._

"Aw, nooo!" Len cried.

Teto patted her pink curls declaring, "Now my hair will probably get messed up..."

Tenten rolled her eyes at her classmates whining, "Just suck it up and deal with it. I've had to endure his "exercising" every day for two years. And you," she spoke up, taking a sharpened pencil and throwing it in Al's direction, "Gai- _sensei_ is not insane." The pencil stabbed into his desk, mere inches away from his arms.

Big Al jumped, recoiling from the pencil. "You sure about that? And how about _you_?"

"Al, please, don't do this. You'll only get yourself hurt... Especially in the pride department..." Ritsu sighed.

"And besides," Gakupo started, "shouldn't these exercises be easy for you? You ARE the tallest of us all."

"True. If shorty- _chan_ here can do it, how can I not?" Al sang, glaring over at Tenten.

" _Shorty?_ I am _not_ short!" Tenten shrieked, yanking a pair of scissors from Kiba's pencil bag, and holding them threateningly. "This time I'll hit your face!"

"Now, now, Tenten," Gai called from the teacher's desk. "What have I told you about fighting larger enemies?"

Tenten glared at Al, preparing to throw her weapon of choice, "Aim. _Lower."_

"L-Lower?" Sweat beaded across Big Al's forehead. Something told him he didn't want to find out what that meant. He, instead, raised his hands in surrender.

Gakupo, sensing the atmosphere, tossed a pencil with nearly equal skill towards Tenten. "Aw, c'mon guys, stop flirting."

Al instantly blushed. "Gakupo! _Flirting_?! What's up with you?!" He threw a punch towards the purple haired teen, but he dodged it easily.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Meanwhile, Kiba was wrestling Tenten for the scissors she was attempting to throw at the other boy. Gai sighed, clearly not liking his students' behaviour.

Slamming his hands onto the desk, he stood from the seat, "FREE TIME'S UP! ONE-HUNDRED LAPS AROUND THE SCHOOL!"

The three former Konoha students immediately jumped to their feet, racing out the door; they knew all too well what would happen if you disobeyed. Gai glared at the remaining students, a determined growl emitting from the back of his throat.

"You really expect us to run?" Teto snarled. "It took me three hours to get my hair like this. THREE. HOURS."

"I'm wearing heels..." Ritsu moaned.

Gakupo yawned, "Whatever. Why bother trying?"

"Aren't you supposed to be some kind of highly trained samurai-type person?" Al asked, stretching. Though, if he were honest, he wasn't quite into this whole running deal either.

"Aren't you supposed to be some kind of good at sports person?"

"Not necessarily. That's a harsh stereotype, Gakupo!"

"So is assuming I'm gay!" He turned sharply to face Ino, hair whacking Big Al.

Big Al let out a _gak_ noise, unused to being attacked by unusually long hair.

The blonde's seat was empty.

Gai simply laughed, "Since you all are opposed to one-hundred laps, you shall do two-hundred laps around the school, four hundred pushups, one hundred and fifty jumping jacks, and three hundred pullups!"

He glared at them, "Do you want me to make it _more?"_

"Wh-Wha-" Gakupo stared at the green-clad teacher with wide eyes. "No thanks!" He ducked out the door quickly.

Teto stormed over towards Gai. "Three. HOURS!" Demon wings sprung out of her back.

"What the... Oh, Teto, stop. It isn't that big of a deal. Put your demon wings back," Ritsu commanded, like an owner to their disobeying dog.

"But Ritsu-"

"Teto...!" Ritsu began, tone rising.

"Fine." Teto tucked her wings back into her back. A strange tidbit about Teto- she had demon wings. No one knew if they were real or not, but they were just... There.

Ritsu shoved his friend out of the door, followed by Len.

"This is ridiculous," Al sighed, still not believing his luck.

Gai laughed heartily and ran ahead of his the school, a single cry could be heard,

"THE POWER OF YOUTH SHALL PREVAIL!"

"'Scuse me, because I'm going to go hide under the bleachers..." Gakupo excused himself from the class, huddling his purple backpack towards his body and ducking away.

Big Al grunted, walking next to Len.

To most of the students' reliefs, the bell ending homeroom chimed throughout the school.

"I MADE IT OUT ALIVE!" Len hollered, rushing into the school building.

Al breathed a sigh of relief- hopefully no more exercise obsessed teachers will cross his path again.

Ino sighed and stooped over to catch her breath, "I don't see how you survived with Gai as your _sensei,_ Tenten…" The brunette shrugged, only slightly winded, "You get used to it after awhile… What do you have next?"

Ino brought her hand to her cheek, pondering her friend's question, "Hmm… Art, I think." Tenten sighed, "Aw, I have English." Ino patted her arm, "Naruto has that too! I think Hinata's got it also, along with Lee!" The brunette perked up at the mention of all her friends.

Kiba jogged up to them, "It's time to go in, right?!" The girls nodded and sweatdropped as the Inuzuka boy pounded a fist to the air shouting, "Yahoo!"

"Well," Tenten groaned, watching Kiba flee back into the school building, "off to English!"

Al glanced at his schedule. "English next. Hmm..." He spun around, trying to locate Gakupo. "Hey, Gakupo!"

"Hey, Al!" he called back in the same tone.

"What class do you have next?"

"Ah, math."

"Aww... Anyone you know have English?"

"Kaito does, Miku does, and I'm sure my sister does." He straightened his backpack strap, preparing to turn to go to his locker.

"Have fun in math," Big Al chirped, somewhat sarcastically.

"Thanks. But you're lucky... Isn't Shakespeare from where you're from?"

"Nope, I'm American. I think Shakespeare's from England... Not for sure, though." He waved, turning down the opposite hall. _Room C120..._

He arrived at the room and peered in. As expected, Gumi, who was Gakupo's sister, Miku, and Kaito were sitting around in their desks.

"Ugh, it's _you_." Miku glared at Al.

"The one and only." He sank into a desk, kicking his legs up onto the table.

The door slid open and a familiar voice echoed throughout the room.

"There's this one girl, you'll like her, she- you gotta be kidding me! Priss is in this class too?! Just my luck! First it's Freakazoid, the tall thing I was telling you about, and now her?"

A softer voice spoke, "Tenni… I-I think the Freakazoid is h-here too…"

"Ah! You _again?"_

Tenten stood near the door, a piece of liquorice dangling from the corner of her mouth, next to an introverted looking girl with long navy hair and pale, pupil-less eyes, glaring at Miku and Al.

"Oh, joy," Al groaned, taking his legs off the desk. "This is going _great_."

Kaito shoved a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth. In between swallows, he said, "That pupil-less girl seems weird."

"Any weirder than you?" Miku cackled, flicking the blue haired boy's head.

"Watch the hair," he snarled.

"Ooh, look!" Gumi chimed, her green hair swishing. "New people!" She dashed over to Tenten and the more shy girl, grabbing their hands excitedly. "I'm Gumi! Gakupo's sister! Onii-chan thinks I'm annoying. But I don't think so. I think I'm fun! He said to stay five feet away from him at all times, but I love him too much to do that. I like carrots! What's your favorite food?" She babbled on and on, ignoring the freaked out looks on the two girls' faces.'

The navy-haired girl giggled as the greenette continued to talk, "I-I'm Hinata and th-this is-"

The door swung open and an upset blond with spiky hair and bright blue eyes ran in; he had strange looking whiskers on his cheeks, "Oi! Hinata-chan! Tenten-chan! You left me behind, dattebayo!"

Tenten rolled her eyes, "Well, you got distracted by the ramen poster and we didn't want to be late for class…" She turned to Gumi, "Oh, this is Naruto, and I'm Tenten. Naruto say hi."

Said blond looked the greenette up and down, "Hey, how come your hair is green?"

Tenten facepalmed and Hinata simply giggled, her face flushed scarlet.

Not caring about the two new girls anymore, Gumi turned her attention to Naruto. "Why is yours blond, New Boy-kun?" she asked, poking him in the chest with her index and middle fingers.

Naruto crossed his arms, glaring at her, "Because it wants to be, Old Girl-chan, dattebayo!"

Tenten sighed and sat down, dragging Hinata with her and forcing the girl to sit next to her. The brunette glared at the American a few seats in front of her, "Let's just see how he likes it when he feels my…" Not bothering to finish her sentence, Tenten glanced at the now tomato-red Hinata.

"Hinata? You okay?"

The pale eyed girl's forehead collided with the table and she mumbled something incoherently. Tenten simply rolled her eyes and watched as Naruto and Gumi continued to converse.

"And mine wants to be green. Just like Onii-chan's is purple. Hey, do you like carrots? What's with the whiskers? How about…" Gumi, once again, continued asking rapid-fire questions.

Al turned his head to glare at Tenten, but it turns out she was already staring at him, so they had a glaring match for a while, until Gumi stomped over there and clapped in between them. Al, of course, blinked, causing Gumi to chant, "HA! Made you blink!" She looked over at Tenten, getting ready to shout the same thing to her, but it turns out Tenten was still intensely glaring. "HA! Made you- Nevermind." She huffed, then went to sit down next to Kaito.

Naruto shrugged as Gumi walked away, finding his own seat behind Hinata and diagonal from Tenten. He snapped next to the brunette's ear, causing her to jerk her head towards him, "Hi, Naruto."

"Who ya starin at?"

"None of your-"

"The t-tall boy," Hinata cut in. The brunette narrowed her eyes at the shy girl, silently trying to use the Force to shove her out of the wooden chair. The blond's lips twisted into a smirk, and he poked at Tenten with his pencil.

"Ne, why don't you just go over there and confess your undying-" he was cut off by the sound of a door being thrown open. "YOSH! TIME FOR MY YOUTHFULNESS TO SHINE BRIGHT!"

The three former Konoha students glanced away, hoping not to be seen by the newcomer but their efforts appeared to be futile. Big bushy eyebrows arched in surprise as the person caught a glimpse of his classmates.

"Naruto-kun! Hinata-chan! Tenten-chan! I did not know you were in my class!"

Naruto glanced up to see none other than Rock Lee standing at the door; the girls beside him on the other hand, chose to keep their gaze averted. "Bushy-brows, you're so loud, dattebayo!" the blue-eyed teen shouted. The black haired boy struck a life-scarring pose (had one not seen it before) and declared, "I can not help it if my passion for youth burns bright!"

Al jumped in his seat, gazing at the creep that just strode in through the door- if indeed that was what he thought he was doing. "A… A mini Gai-sensei?!"

"Who's Gai-sensei?" Gumi asked, leaning over towards him.

Miku screeched, "Apparently an unhygienic freak!"

"How is he unhygienic?" Kaito sighed, cupping his chin in his palm.

"He… He just is!" she shouted. "His eyebrows! They just- AUGH!" She bent down towards her backpack to shuffle through it. She came back up with a pair of tweezers. "Come here!" She jumped up and ran towards the youthful lad.

Luckily, Big Al stood up in time to catch her before she could yank anyone's eyebrows out. "Stop doing that!" he cried, shoving her away and rubbing his forehead. "I remember when I first came to this school, you attempted to pull these stitches out 'cuz you thought they were distorted eyebrows…"

Miku huffed, surrendering and sulking back into her seat. Upon her return, she smirked over towards Tenten and purred silently to where only she could hear, "So, you got the hots for Big Al over there, eh? I can see why you would, considering he's weird and you're most likely equally weird. Want me to call him up and let him know? I'm sure he would be delighted."

Gumi somehow happened to hear, despite how Miku murmured it to Tenten in a very low voice. She squealed with delight, coincidentally piercing Kaito's eardrums, all while slamming her fists on her desk with excitement. "THE NEW GIRL LIKES BIG AL?!"

The whole room turned silent.

Tenten, not wanting to be the target of their attention, turned to Hinata, who also happened to a 'new girl', "Hina-chan! I can't believe you didn't tell me, your BEST FRIEND, that you had a crush!" Sure she had just sacrificed the extremely shy girl to be a victim for a group of gossips at a brand new school, but, hey, isn't that what best friends are for? Hinata gaped at the girl, but upon catching her glare, gulped and laughed nervously, " _G-Gomen'nasai,_ Tenten-chan… B-But I thought y-you would th-think it w-was st-stupid..."

Tenten nodded slightly, telling the navy-haired girl she'd made the right choice, and slumped back in her seat. "Ah, young love," she cooed, shoving another piece of the sweet black candy into her mouth. Naruto and Lee glanced at each other, blinking in confusion.

Miku stared, mouth agape, Gumi was non stop giggling, and Big Al's face was growing redder by the second.

Miku snapped, "Uh, that's not what I heard!"

Big Al's view changed from Gumi and Miku to Hinata, speechless and utterly confused. _But I hadn't even known she'd existed until five minutes ago!_

Kaito glanced at the blushing Hinata. _Hnn, and I didn't even see her this morning…_

Miku was now glaring daggers at Tenten. _Idiot, you knew you were staring at him! I saw the look in your eyes!_ She muttered, "I swear, Tenten, I WILL make you admit to liking Al…"

Gumi was practically dancing like there were ants in her pants. _Al has an admirer! Al has an admirer! Al has an admirer! Who is probably a stalker! She looks stalker-like! But still! Al has an admirer!_

Al continued looking Hinata over. "Wh-What? Why? You barely even know me!"

Hinata began to stammer incoherently, until catching Tenten's glare that read ' _think of something before I shove a stick of liquorice down your throat'._ Hinata, now redder than a tomato, fiddled with the zipper of her jacket while murmuring, "I-I s-saw you th-this m-morning i-in th-the h-hallway… I-I h-have a th-thing for… t-tall m-men?" The last part sounded more like a question than a statement. Tenten smirked proudly behind another piece of the candy she never seemed to run out of.

"Hmmph, well, he is pretty tall," Miku sighed. "Still not a good excuse, though," she muttered under her breath.

Big Al, eyes still wide, quickly jerked forwards in his seat, shielding himself from the girls with his book. _This is not good. This is not good. This is not good. Thisisnotgood. thisisnotgoodthisisnotgoodthisisnot-_

"Hey, stuttering girl. How can you tell he's tall if you're blind?" Kaito asked innocently, tapping his chin thoughtfully.

Gumi raised her eyebrow. "Huh, I never thought of that."

Hinata's blush deepened, if that was even possible, and she opened her mouth to respond, but a certain blond cut her off.

"Hinata-chan's not blind, dattebayo," he declared, squinting disapprovingly at his fellow pupils. "That's right," Lee threw in, "it's the mark of the Hyuuga. Everyone in her family has pale eyes, including her cousin Neji. He is a student here also."

"Oh… Cool. Everyone in my family wears a scarf," Kaito replied, grinning, obviously not understanding the concept.

Miku rolled her eyes. "That's nothing, Kaito. Everyone in my family is _beautiful_ , but they're nothing compared to me." She flipped her teal hair over her shoulder to prove the fact.

Gumi sighed, "There's nothing special about my family, though… You'd think they were all _samurai_ by looking at Gakupo, but really, only our great, great, great, great, great…" She paused to count on her fingers. "...great, great grandfather Kamui was a samurai." She made a point- Gumi was slightly tanner than her brother, and besides, her hair was green while Gakupo's was purple.

Big Al, on a regular day with regular circumstances, would have added in that most of his family on his dad's side were giants, but he wasn't going to risk it.

Lee opened his mouth to comment on just how _unyouthful_ Miku's complexion was, but was interrupted by the sound of the classroom door sliding open.

"Ah, sorry I'm late," the person said. "I got lost trying to find the bathroom when suddenly a group of rogue FBI agents attacked and I had to fight them off. They kidnapped a group of elementary students so of course I just had to help out. We looked everywhere for them and finally found them in a cave full of ponies and butterflies-"

" _KAKASHI-SENSEI?!"_

The silver-haired man glanced up at the sound of his name, smiling beneath the mask that covered the lower portion of his face as he saw who the voice belonged to.

"Oi, Naruto! Good to see that you're in my class!"

" _Your_ class?!" The blue-eyed boy shouted once again, jutting a finger at the masked man. "Of course," said man replied, "I am the new English teacher after all." He continued, ignoring more of the blond's questioning, "Now, class, please come to the front row by row so that I may give you the book we are to be reading for our assignment this term."

Big Al facedesked, the action of slamming one's forehead onto your desk with exasperation. If the newbies knew this teacher, what were the chances of him not being a wackadoodle?

Gumi chirped, "Ooh! I like reading!" She was the first to rush to the front of the room, Kaito following her.

Miku sighed and trailed after Kaito, careful not to trip over Al's foot, for his leg was stretched across the aisle between the desks.

Soon, the row that Al was in was up next, so he reluctantly pulled himself up and trudged to the front of the room.

Miku crossed her arms impatiently. "Well, aren't you going to tell us what book we're going to be reading, _Kakashi-sensei_?" she hissed bitterly.

Ignoring the turquoise haired girl until every student had a copy of the book, he calmly walked to the chalkboard and held the small book in his hands; his open eye twinkled with stars.

Naruto glared at the book before loudly announcing, "AW! Kakashi- _sensei,_ isn't this that super pervy book you read all the time?!"

Kakashi narrowed his one open eye at the boy, "It's called ' _Icha Icha Paradise',_ Naruto." The blond scowled at the book, "Is this even appropriate for us?"

"Not in the slightest~"

"Then why-"

The bell signaling that the period was over rang.

"Don't forget to read two chapters for homework!"

The former Konoha students groaned, obviously not liking this assignment.

"What's so bad about-" Gumi began as she flipped open the book. "What the… I… I don't understand…" She pranced over to the blue haired boy asking, "Kaito, what does this mean?"

Kaito choked on his words, instantly blushing. No words could form about what he was reading. "I- It- I can't- Why-" He quickly shifted his scarf to cover his nose, running out into the hall, bag slung over his shoulder.

"...Okay, bye! I'll ask Gakupo!" she cheered, waving him off. "Hey, Big Al!"

"What is it, Gumi?" He was studying the cover of the book, unsure whether he should keep it or dump it, considering Kaito's reaction.

"What does this mean?" She flipped the book back open to the page she showed Kaito.

Big Al blushed for the hundredth time that day. "Um… Gumi… I'm relieved you don't understand that…" He stared at the book longer, somewhat terrified of its contents. Eventually, he slammed it shut.

"Well?"

"Y-You should ask your brother." Al massaged his forehead, now scarred by the book's contents. To himself, he groaned, "Now I get why they were all complaining…"

Gumi continued to ponder about the book as she wandered out into the hall, green messenger bag in her other hand.

Miku had just discovered the main plot of _Icha Icha Paradise_. Her eyes widened, then she burst out laughing. "Wow, this… It just…" More laughter.

Big Al rolled his eyes, moving to get his black and red backpack. "I don't think I'll be willingly doing this lesson," he said to no one in particular as he walked into the bustling hallway.

Tenten sighed, not believing that Kakashi was actually making them read his favourite book.

"So, Hinata, what class do you have next?" The shorter girl checked her schedule before answering, "P.E…"

"Bummer, I got Home Economics."

"Neji h-has that, too."

"Really? Neji took Home Ec.?"

"Yeah," the navy haired girl said, shrugging. Tenten let out a shocked 'huh' before retrieving her Chinese-ish messenger bag. Hinata put her finger to her chin, in thought, "I'll s-see you at lunch, r-right?"

"Yup!"

"L-Later, then…"

"Bye," Tenten called as her friend left. "Have fun baking," Naruto snickered, following Hinata out the door. "YOSH! Have fun!" Lee shouted, running after them. The brunette sighed, clenching her fist determinedly, "Time to go learn how not to burn water!" She marched proudly out of the class, her head held high while Kakashi simply sweatdropped at her statement.

Big Al walked out with Miku at his side.

"Hey, Al, what class do you have next?" Miku sneered.

He grunted, "Home Ec."

Miku giggled, "Wow, how manly. I'm sure you'll be a great husband to Hinata-chan!"

Big Al's eyes narrowed. "Oh, shut up! One, I don't like this Hinata, and two, I only took Home Ec. 'cuz band and art were already full…"

"Hmm, well, stinks for you. I'm off to… Ugh… Math… Have a sucky life!" She turned on her heel, hair swishing, and strutted off to the other hall.

"Whatever," Al said gruffly, tightening his grip on his bag.

When he got to the room, he took a look around the classroom.

Teto was busy trying to convince her partner, another new student, to let her bake some French bread (hopefully her "demon wings" wouldn't sprout), Rin was dancing around like a three year old, blond hair whacking her cheeks, and Len was getting very, very, annoyed at his twin's antics.

"Lovely class," Al murmured, choosing a seat next to Len's.

Once again, there was no teacher.

Once again, there would possibly be another thrilling new one.

The door flew open, and the sound of feet smacking harshly against the cold, tile floor reverberated throughout the room. "NEJINEJINEJINEJINEJI! YOU GOTTA LET ME BE YOUR- daaang iiit!"

The source of the commotion was none other than Tenten, in all her messy-bunned glory; she glared at Teto, "Dang it! Neji, why'd you have to partner up with her? Now I'll have to partner with some random person!" Her chocolate orbs (yum) darted around the room, searching for an available seat as the dark haired boy just shrugged.

The only open spot was next to…

"Uggh… of all people it had to be _you?"_

Al looked up to see who was complaining. "What? Are there not any other-" He gazed around the room once more. "There aren't any other seats." He groaned, putting his forehead in his palms.

"Aw, he won't bite!" Len smirked. "RIN, STOP! YOU'RE GOING TO CATCH THE ROOM ON FIRE!"

Al glared at the blonde boy. "Thanks, Len. I owe you," he growled, voice dripping in sarcasm.

Len payed no attention to the bigger teen's snapping remark, but he was instead trying to get his sister away from the oven. "Rin!"

"Oh, come on, I'm just looking!" his sister giggled, admiring the stove. "I'm not going to turn it on. You're just being overprotective, that's all." She skipped back over to her seat, not even bothering to take a glimpse at her partner she happened to sit next to yet.

Len muttered to his partner, also unsure as to who she was, "Ugh, siblings…"

Teto stared into Neji's pale eyes, trying to beg with all her heart for him to let her make some bread. "Pleasepleasepleaseplease!" Fake tears pricked the corners of her eyes. "I reaaaaally want soooome! I'll give you a slice!"

The long haired teen rolled his eyes, "I don't care what we make as long as you don't become a hinderance."

Len's partner looked down at him, not even the slightest bit sympathetic. "I haven't gotten any siblings," she said indignantly.

Meanwhile, Rin's partner was busy sniffing her hair while she was distracted. "You smell like oranges," he pointed out, his nose twitching slightly.

Tenten, on the other hand, was trying not to converse with her partner, "Stupid luck… Stupid being late… Stupid Neji… Stupid English that I can't read…" She glared at the ingredients on their table, trying to make out the letters and words but failing.

Big Al rapped his fingers atop the desk as Tenten was glaring at the ingredients. "You can't read English, but I can?" he smirked. "Cool, another advantage besides being tall." He picked up a nearby bag of flour. "See, this says F-L-O-U-R. Flour." He beamed as he put the powder-filled bag down, studying her sulk expression.

Rin turned her head to her partner, who, for some reason, was sniffing her hair intensely. "Uh huh, and you smell like dogs!" she replied, tapping his chest.

"Well, you're lucky," Len sighed, glowering. "Siblings are a pain in the butt." He shot another glare at his sister, who now seemed to be poking her partner. He huffed and turned to face the front.

"Yay!" Teto chimed. She hustled over towards the oven, searching for the ingredients.

Rin's partner sniffed his own arm, "Huh, guess you're right…" Neji was busy trying not to let his eye twitch as he watched the girl skip off. The pink haired girl next to Len simply rolled her eyes.

At their table, Tenten snorted, "You sound like a complete idiot spelling stuff out like that."

"Eh... How so?" Big Al asked, leaning against the back of his chair. "I'm displaying how to spell English stuff. Like how 'red' is spelled 'R-E-A-D' and 'whine' is spelled 'W-I-N-E'. English is easy!" he teased.

The door opened once again, causing all of the students to turn their heads. An elderly woman was in the doorway, short-cropped white hair bouncing off her shoulders. Despite her elderly and wise look, she was quite short, hunched over as she walked to the front of the room.

"Oh, look- the teacher!" Len said, finally taking his eyes off Rin.

"I am Chiyo-sensei. Most people call me Granny Chiyo. I will be your home ec. teacher this year!" The old teacher set some scrolls on the desk, then glanced around the room. "I see you all have your partners, yes?"

"Yeah, but I'd rather be dead," Al muttered.

Tenten shot a glare towards her partner, her lips drawn into a tight frown.

"Bread!" Teto called from the back of the room.

Neji sighed in slight annoyance at her outburst.

"I am sure you all know the main reason we take home ec., which is learning about skills for around the house for when you are an adult," she explained. "Today we will begin our semester-long project: learning what to do when taking care of a child." She produced a scroll from her desk and opened it. "We will be using puppets I have created to use as the baby models."

Nearly half of the room sputtered. "Taking care of a... Baby?" the class murmured.

Suddenly, a startlingly lifelike baby puppet appeared on every desk, one for each pair of partners. "Now, you must be gentle with these dolls- they are very delicate," Granny Chiyo warned.

"These... These look so real... It's almost creepy!" Len gagged.

"Are these, like, real babies that were preserved?" Al asked suspiciously.

"Actually, yes! They are!" the teacher chimed. The whole class gained grossed-out faces. "Alright, for the first lesson, we are going to learn how to feed the baby..."

Rin choked, "R-Real babies?" She poked the one on her table.

Teto only let out a distinguished _ew_.

"Great, so now we gotta raise a child together," Big Al groaned, returning his forehead into his palm.

Tenten smirked, glancing sideways at him, her chin resting on her fist. "It'll help you practice for when you and Hina-chan get married," she replied in a sing-song voice. "By the way," she said, her voice dropping to a whisper, "Hinata told me that she wants _lots_ of babies, so be prepared~!"

Big Al would probably have a major migraine the next day, for once again, his head collided with the table. He muttered something to himself, but it was most likely unintelligible English babble.

"The first step to taking care of your puppet is-"

"Yeah, yeah, we know how to feed it. Like this!" Teto picked up a piece of French bread she somehow made in five minutes flat and attempted to shove it in her wooden doll's mouth. This caused the doll to emit a shrill and sudden cry, making Teto jump.

"Incorrect, Kasane-san. You must be gentle with your child. And since it is young, it cannot yet eat solid foods such as bread. Can Kagamine Len display the proper way to nurture a child?" Chiyo asked, choosing a random name from her class roster that she recalled.

"Uh, sure?" Len gasped. He studied the contents on the table, grabbing up a bottle, formula, and a spoon. He quickly mixed the formula into the bottle, and gently gave it to the baby.

"Very good, Mr. Kagamine." Taking another look around the room, she decided to call upon Tenten. "You, one with the panda ears for hair. Can you demonstrate how to hold a baby? You can try handing it to your partner as well."

"Um… okay," she said, a bit confused.

Tenten carefully lifted the doll into her arms so that its tiny head was positioned comfortably in the crook of her elbow, her hand caressing its shoulder. She placed her other hand beneath its bottom so that its feet could rest against her stomach. She stared at it awkwardly for a few seconds before turning to Al.

Al stuttered, "Uh, handing me a baby isn't such a good idea, because one time I dropped a freaking bowling ball on my toe and I wasn't even-"

"Now, the girl can hand her partner the baby. Very gently, now..." Granny Chiyo instructed.

Tenten narrowed her brown eyes at Al. "Take. The freaking. Baby," she hissed, leaning towards him to keep it safely against herself. She pressed her arms against his, sliding the doll into them and positioning his hands in the correct way to hold it.

He gripped the baby, trying to not make it screech. He tenderly held it, rocking it gently back and forth. "Ah, there we go..." He gained enough confidence to try to hold it against his shoulder, pretending burp it.

Tenten grinned smugly at him, "So… you can actually hold a baby without breaking it? _Shocker_."

Al glared at her. "I can take care of children if I wanna. Isn't that right, Al Jr.?" he asked, turning his head to the wooden baby.

That was when the fake baby decided to spit up on his "daddy".

Big Al, certainly not amused, handed the baby back to Tenten. "...Yeah. Your turn." Once the baby was safely in the girl's arms, he turned towards the sink to try to wash the puke out, sending some of the class into giggles.

"Okay, how about Kagamine Rin and Inuzuka Kiba? Can you two demonstrate how to change a diaper?" the old woman asked.

"Alright!" Rin chimed, starting to take the diaper off of the dummy. Unfortunately, the doll began to pee on Kiba's face with precise aim.

Instinctively, Kiba's hand shot out in defense, knocking the doll off the table in the process.

"Ew! Blegh! Gross! It peed on me!" he cried, grabbing a towel and scrubbing his face.

The doll screeched as it hit the floor. "Ah!" Rin cried, trying to pick it up. "That's not how you change a diap- Whoops." She dropped the baby once more, making it pee again.

The two became a pair of yelling imbeciles, crying about dropping the baby and getting urinated on.

Len smacked his palm to his forehead. "Idiots, that's not how you change a diaper." He picked up his sister's doll and set it back on the table, skillfully changing its cloth underwear.

"Right again, Mr. Kagamine," Chiyo sighed.

Kiba scowled at the wooden baby, muttering a curse under his breath. He stuck his tongue out at Len as he returned to his seat; he continued to rub his face and jacket with the fluffy towel. Len's partner nodded approvingly at him, impressed.

Meanwhile, Tenten held the baby protectively to her as Al finished cleaning himself up, "We are _not_ naming our baby Al Jr.!"

Rin sighed, "Poor baby..."

Len grunted a response, crossing his arms as he sat back down.

Al returned the towel to the sink, turning towards Tenten. "Aww, why not? What do _you_ want to name it?"

"Hmm… what about Kiku?" she asked hopefully. "It's much better than Al Jr.!"

"But... Alfred is a great name..." he groaned. "It's American... Different... The name of Batman's servant dude..."

Teto, overhearing the two's conversation, leaned over towards Neji. "Hmm... Let's name ours French Bread!"

Neji's eye twitched, "I'm not calling the baby 'French Bread'." He narrowed his eyes at the baby.

"Tell you what," he said, "you be the mother that looks after the baby all the time and I'll be the father that lives far away and pays child support."

"Okay!" Teto agreed instantly, not really understanding. "As long as I can name it French Bread! French Bread Beatrice... Um, what's your last name?"

"Hyuuga."

"French Bread Beatrice Hyuuga!"

Tenten grinned, "Yao it is! It's Chinese; you'll love it and appreciate it."

Al moaned, "Fine. Yao Jones." He huffed, taking the baby from Tenten's arms.

Tenten crossed her arms, smirking at the sight before her. She raised her hand, "Um… Granny Chiyo? Do we have to take these dolls everywhere with us?"

Granny Chiyo pondered for a moment, not thinking of this before. "No, not any time soon. But if you're failing this class by-"

The bell rang, ending the class before she could finish, resulting in no one hearing her.

Big Al picked up his bag, declaring, "Finally! Now I don't have to deal with this anymore..."

The shorter brunette elbowed her taller partner in the side. "Aw, you love this and you know it!" she sang smugly, grabbing her bag as well.

"Hmmph. Whatever." He twisted around to meet Len. "Hey, Len! How come you're so good with kids?"

"Well, I had to take care of her like a little baby until third grade," he replied, gesturing to Rin. Funny, because they were twins...

"Ah... So, what class you got next?"

"English. What do you have?"

"Haha, good luck. I have P.E."

"'Good luck'?"

"You'll see. Well, I'm off. See you." Al strode out, raising his hand as a sort of goodbye.

Tenten turned to leave when she caught sight of Len's partner. "Sakura?" she choked out. "You're in this class too?"

The pinkette rolled her eyes, smiling, "Yeah. Been here the whole time, thanks for noticing."

"Eh-heh-heh, sorry… What class do you have next?"

"Physics, you?"

"P.E."

"Ooh, your partner has that too, I overheard him talking to mine."

"That's ni- what?! Ugh!"

Sakura blinked, confused, "What's wrong?"

Tenten stomped her foot on the ground, her lips pulled tight in a grimace, "I can't stand him! I have had _every_ class with him so far! I swear, someone did this on purpose!"

"Maybe you're meant to be together," Sakura giggled as Tenten slammed her head to her palm. "If we have the same class," she muttered, "then I'm going to stalk him!"

Sakura stared at her friend before laughing, "You do that, oh wise _kunoichi."_

"I will."

"Okay then."

"Goodbye!"

"...Bye?"

And so, the brunette scurried out the door in order to catch up with the teen she planned to 'stalk'.

Big Al was at his locker, shoving everything into it and pulling out his gym clothes. _Dang it, I hope that Gai-sensei's not the gym teacher. That would ruin everything... Well, at least make it worse than it already is._

A slamming noise was heard from beside him, causing him to jump and defensively put his hands up towards his head. It was only a girl, though, with waist-long light pink hair. Luka had just crashed into a locker, face buried in a book.

"Huh...?" she let out, looking around, temporarily putting her book to the side. "Oh, haha! I'm at my locker. Looks like I ran into a wall again."

Big Al raised an eyebrow at the girl. He had witnessed her running into things multiple times before from reading a book, but he still wondered if it were good for her health. "Luka?"

"Oh, hi, Al. I have this really good book you'd probably like. It's called-"

"Are you alright? You... Uh..."

"Yeah, I know, it happens all the time. Anyway, where you headin'?"

"Gym. What about you?"

"Same. So how has your day been going?"

"Awful," Big Al groaned. "First, in homeroom, this crazy teacher made us run around the school, then in English another made us read this awful, perverted book, and just now I got barfed on by a baby doll. I'm fearing gym. Besides, this freaky new girl has been in every single one of my classes today. Getting on my nerves."

"Huh. My day's been considerably normal. Or I just haven't noticed anything bizarre because I was reading," Luka told him.

Sometimes Big Al thought he could trust Luka with anything- they had instantly become friends a few years back because she, too, could speak English. In fact, without their realization, they would sometimes have whole conversations in English. With the weird looks people were giving them in the hall, Al figured they were speaking the foreign language that moment.

"I heard Miku's in P.E. right now, and so is Ruko," Luka said.

"Really? Huh. This will be interesting. The priss and the lazy one." Al had once wanted to be a gym teacher, but he concluded that that would never happen, for he would fall asleep during class and forget when to dismiss the students.

They turned into the hall with the gymnasium, going separate ways for the different locker rooms.

Tenten sighed to herself, she'd had no luck finding her target. "Maybe I should stalk people _after_ I know my way around the school."

"Who were you stalking?" The sudden, deep voice had caught Tenten unaware, causing her to shriek and drop her gym clothes. She turned to see who had surprised her, putting her hand to her chest as she recognized the messy red hair and cyan eyes. "Gaara! You scared the bajeebers outta me!" she cried, bending over to pick up her items.

The red-head simply watched as she stood back up and poked his chest with her finger.

"You shouldn't sneak up on people like that!"

"You were the one stalking people."

"W-Well… I mean, that's different!"

"..."

"Okay, fine, so maybe it's not… But, that's not the point!"

Tenten slung her bag over her shoulder and glanced over at the cyan-eyed boy, "So, where are you headed?"

"P.E."

"Oh," the brunette replied smartly. "Let's walk together?" she requested.

"..."

"I'll take that as a yes!"

The two walked in silence to the gym area before splitting up to enter the designated locker rooms.

When everyone was out on the gym floors, they all decided to chat amongst themselves. Since Luka was too busy being engrossed in her book, Al decided to sit against the wall alone.

Meanwhile, Miku was complaining about the fact gym even existed to Ruko.

"Tell me about it. Why can't we just have a free period to, like, nap or something?" Ruko folded her arms over her chest, annoyed. "Hey, how about you go annoy someone else?"

Miku turned a full 360 degrees until she found a target- it was no other than Rock Lee. She rushed over to him, careful to not mess up her designer gym shoes. When she approached him, she tapped him on the shoulder. "Uh, excuse me. I thought I told you to take care of those eyebrows. I can do it for you, if you're incapable of doing it yourself."

Lee glanced over his shoulder at the girl, ceasing to continue the jumping jacks he had been in the middle of doing. "Oh! You're that girl with unyouthful skin from English period! And, I do take care of my eyebrows; that is why they are so soft and shiny," he declared, running a finger along one of his extremely thick eyebrows.

" _Unyouthful_?" Miku screeched. "Why, I oughtta-"

Ruko managed to stop Miku in time before she tackled the boy with the strange haircut. "Gosh, Miku. You're something else when it comes to insults. And your skin _does_ look pretty dry."

Miku scoffed.

Lee struck a 'nice guy' pose, "I can lend you some of the moisturizer I use!" He began doing squats, "It keeps me looking refreshing and beautiful!"

Tenten and Gaara just happened to walk in while Lee began his squats, and the view from behind was not something pretty, so they shielded their eyes and walked away, trying to erase the image from their minds.

"It can help you to look beautiful, too!" Lee continued, oblivious to the vein about to pop out of Miku's forehead.

Miku stormed towards him, attempting to whack him off balance. "No, I don't want to borrow your moisturizer. I don't want to be ugly like you. And stop those ridiculous squats! You look like a moron doing them!"

Al saw Tenten walk through the door with Gaara, so he let out an inhuman noise, popping up and dashing over to her. "You're in _this_ class with me, too?!"

Tenten jutted a finger at Al and turned to Gaara, "Ah! Gaara a bug! It's huge! Kill it!"

Said red-head stared at her like she'd gone insane, "...No thanks," and walked away. Tenten crossed her arms and puffed out her cheeks, glaring at Gaara's retreating back.

"Dang it… you're so mean, Gaa-kun!"

"I'll squish you if you call me that again," he replied over his shoulder in a bored tone. The brown-eyed girl huffed and plopped down on the ground, frowning up at Big Al like a child when they didn't get what they wanted.

Big Al glared back down at her. This went on for a while until he sat down with her, where they continued their staring match. "Why do you keep appearing?" he eventually asked with annoyance.

"Not my choice," she snarled back. "Like I want to be stuck with _you_ every day!" she spat vehemently.

"Well, we have to just suck it up and deal with it!" he roared. "I thought you might actually be nice, but I guess I was wrong." He leaned back against the wall, studying Tenten's face.

Tenten internally flinched at his statement, but didn't let it show. "I am nice," she declared, "I just don't like you." She folded her arms over her chest, huffing in annoyance, "Quit staring at me!"

"Only if you quit staring at me!" He snapped around, facing the wall. Having no interest in talking to anyone, he began to count the cracks in the brick. _One... Two... Three... Four... That one's shaped like an 's'... Six…_

The brunette let out a 'humph' and turned her back to him as well, crossing her legs and placing her chin in her palm. "You're a jerk," she muttered.

"..." _Ten... Eleven... Twelve... Thirteen... That one looks like a star, almost…_

"You're loud," she continued, eyes glued to the floor.

"Actually, I think I'm keeping to myself quite nicely at the moment," he grunted. "Hey, did you know there are twenty-three cracks in this one brick alone?"

"No, because I don't count the cracks in bricks," she snorted. "That's boring. Did _you_ know that if you stab someone in the neck with a needle it puts them in a near-death state?" she asked innocently.

"I'll take your word for it." Al pulled his knees closer to his chest, hugging them. "Did you know that Gakupo gets really angry whenever someone puts a huge wad of bubblegum in his hair? I tried that once, but it didn't end well."

The brunette snickered, "Who wouldn't be angry about a wad of bubblegum being stuck in their hair? Did you know that-"

She was cut short by a loud thud. Turning towards the noise she saw a familiar woman with purplish hair standing in the middle of the gym.

"Alright, maggots!" the woman spoke loudly, addressing the students. "From now on I'm your new gym teacher, Mitarashi Anko! Today we'll be playing dodge ball so line up in order by your surnames! You got that? I don't see anybody moving! Hurry up and get in a line or you'll be lifting weights for the rest of the term!"

The students all scrambled to form a line, no one wanting to be stuck lifting heavy objects the rest of the term.

Anko walked down the line, assigning students to a team according to their surname.

"Hatsune! Left side!" she continued down her list until each team had an even amount of numbers. "Now, listen up, maggots!" she hollered from her spot on the bleachers.

"I don't wanna hear any complaining if you get hit in the face, groin, breast, or any other spot that might hurt! Suck it up and sit out until you're returned in! Now, when I blow the whistle, you can start! Last team with at least one person standing wins!"

There was a shrill sound as the woman blew on the small metal device tied around her neck.

Big Al's team consisted of Miku, Gaara, and another kid with a spiky, dark ponytail that made his face look like a pineapple. He rushed to the line of dodgeballs, scooping one up, but unsure as to where to throw it. He didn't feel like pelting anyone with a ball, really. Maybe he should aim for that weird kid with the bushy eyebrows Miku was raising heck about. He pulled back his arm, pitching the ball towards Lee. Al figured he would be the only one actually doing anything, since Miku would wimp out, the pineapple kid looked lazy, and Gaara… Well, he wasn't that sure about him. He dodged a few more of the rubber spheres as he ran back towards the wall.

Tenten glanced at her small team. Lee and Ruko, the girl she'd met in the hallway that morning, were on her team, and so was another girl with long pink hair. She contemplated throwing a few of the balls, but thought it would be unfair since she could almost always hit her target.

She decided to be nice and get the dark haired boy, Shikamaru, out, since she knew he didn't plan on doing anything and looked rather bored.

Lee was hit multiple times, yet never went to sit out, for he didn't seem to grasp the concept of the game. About halfway through the game, Gaara walked to the line separating the teams, and simply stood there. Tenten figured he was tired of playing, and so she decided to ask Ruko if she would get him out. "Pleaaaase?" she begged.

"Why me? You're probably more than capable of getting him out… But fine." Ruko picked up a ball and hurled it towards Gaara.

Big Al noticed that he and Miku were now the only ones left on his team. "Oh, great," he muttered. He proceeded to dodge a few more, listening to Miku cry out in anger when one nearly hit her.

"UGH!" Miku snarled, storming up next to Al. "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! I AM SICK OF ALL THIS DODGEBALL AND GYM CRAP!" She seized a ball, hurling it towards Ruko. As Ruko paced to the side to sit out, the teal haired teen attempted to pelt Tenten with a ball as well, but to no avail. Next, she tossed one at Rock Lee, smacking him head-on. "I. Am. DONE." She stomped over to where Ruko was sitting.

Now Al truly _was_ the last man standing. And technically, since Lee refused to go sit down, Tenten was the last woman standing as well. It dawned on him that he probably didn't stand a chance at all.

Every single ball was on Tenten's side by now, but she refused to throw any, claiming it unfair.

"Then close your eyes," Shikamaru suggested from the sidelines. The girl shrugged and picked up a purple ball, putting a hand over her eyes as she launched the ball in a random direction.

"Did I hit him?" she called, her eyes still covered.

"Nope," the said opponent chanted, catching the ball she tossed with a nice sounding _thunk_ when the rubber collided with his palms. "But I caught it, and you know what that means… You're out!"

Tenten uncovered her eyes, gaping. "Dang it!" she cried, stomping a foot on the ground. "It's alright, Tenten! There's always next time!" Lee shouted, still out on the field. Calmly, she walked towards the sidelines as the teacher starting yelling again. Waiting until his back was turned, the brunette growled as she grabbed one of the light orange balls and chucked it at Big Al, nailing him in the back of the head.

Big Al gasped as the ball smacked the back of his head. He reached up to rub the now growing bruise and spun around to where Tenten was. "Not fair!" he shouted over Anko.

The purplish-haired woman glowered down at him, "Pipe down, maggot, before-" Her sentence was cut short by the sound of Tenten slamming another rubber ball into Al's face.

Al was about to snap at the teacher that she shouldn't call him a maggot, considering he's a foot taller than her, but was now occupied with a heavily bleeding nose. This day was getting suckier by the minute. "What the heck?!" he cried in English instinctively. "Why did you do that?!" Again in English. He squeezed a ball in one hand, nose being held by the other, and prepared to launch it towards her. He had a sudden moment of clarity before he released it, remembering that he was a six-foot-four giant while she was a way smaller girl. Still, he knew she was capable of dodging it, but...

He dropped the ball and walked out of the gym, leaving a trail of blood on the polished wooden floor.

"Alright, that's enough. Next time I say the game's over, it's _over._ That means, no more throwing balls! Not that I don't like a little blood on the playing field or anything," Anko murmured the last part to herself. "Go get changed, maggots!"

The remaining students filed out to get dressed in their respective locker rooms.

"Why'd you do that?" Gaara asked as he walked next to Tenten on the way out. The shorter girl shrugged, "I dunno. I just had a feeling he would tease me about it later so I decided to make sure he kept his trap shut."

Gaara scoffed, "That's stupid."

"You know what they say," Lee chimed, popping up between the two, "when a boy teases a girl, it means he likes her~!"

"Ew!" Tenten scrunched up her nose in disgust. "That's absolutely disgusting, Lee!"

The ebony haired boy winked as he struck his famous 'nice guy' pose for the second time that period and dragged a protesting Gaara off quickly down the hall.

"Disgusting…" Tenten muttered once more, to herself, as she entered the locker rooms.

"What's disgusting?" Ruko asked, getting her pants out of her locker.

Luka raised an eyebrow at Tenten, internally asking the same question as she studied her book.

Miku was still fuming about dodgeball to care.

Reeling in surprise, Tenten let out a startled, "Aiyaa!"

She fumbled for words as she gathered her things from her locker, "U-Um… B-Bugs… and h-hairy backs?" She smiled nervously, hoping they believed her excuse that was almost as lame as Hinata's.

"Yeah, they kind of are," Luka agreed, eyes refocusing onto her book.

"Yeah, right," Miku sighed, rolling her eyes. "That's not what you think's disgusting. C'mon, spill!"

Tenten sighed in defeat, her shoulders sagging a bit. "Okay, fine, I'll tell you," she said lowly. In a grave voice, she beckoned Miku closer, whispering, "If you really want to know… It's your perfume! It smells awful! I can hardly take being this close to you; you smell like rotten fish." As if to add emphasis, the brunette pinched the bridge of her nose and waved a hand in front of her face.

Miku emitted a low growl in her throat. She picked up her perfume bottle from the bench and squirted it in Tenten's face. She turned back around, acting as if nothing threatening had happened.

Tenten staggered backwards, coughing and covering her nose. "Ugh!" she cried in disgust.

The bell rang, signaling lunchtime.

Al walked with Kaito and Ritsu towards the cafeteria, talking about how everyone's days were going. His nose had stopped bleeding, thankfully, so he didn't have to keep a cloth to it anymore.

"I'm gonna have ice cream for dessert!" Kaito sang.

"Of course you are. What else would you have?" Ritsu chuckled. "What about you, Al? What did you bring?"

"Huh? Oh! A cheeseburger and fries." Big Al grinned as he held up his lunch bag. His friends nodded in approval.

When they got to the lunchroom, they found the table Gakupo and Luka were sitting at. They took their seats, digging into their lunch and watching out for more friends.

"Hey, guys," Ritsu said. "We should all hit the ramen shop this afternoon. We could invite the newbies, too."

Gakupo nodded. "Good idea."

"I've still never been to that place. Do they have ice-"

"No, Kaito, they don't have ice cream. It's a _ramen_ shop, hence the word ramen," Luka sighed, looking up from her book long enough to take a bite of tuna fish salad.

Gakupo wiped eggplant stew off of his chin. "But anyway, I think inviting them to dinner's a good idea. We should try to be nice to them. They seem like they're not from here."

Big Al nodded, following their conversation. _That means she'll be coming. Ergh…_

Stumbling into the cafeteria came Meiko, the brunette's hair covering her face in a way that made her look distressed and terrified of the world. She crept over towards the group, gripping her bright red lunchbox timidly.

"Meiko!" Kaito chirped, running to help her up, for she had tripped.

"H-Hey, guys," she stammered.

"Kinda weird, you haven't been in any of my classes this year," Ritsu brought up. Meiko nodded.

Rin skipped in, followed by a sulking Len.

"I thought I told you to not sit at the same table as me," he groaned, brushing a tuft of bright blond hair out of his sky blue eyes.

His sister's identical eyes twinkled as she responded with, "Well, I don't know where else to sit! Gumi-chan's probably going to sit where you are, so that's where I'm going!"

Right when she was brought up, Gumi walked through the lunch room's doors. " _ONII-CHAAAN_!" she screamed, running over to Gakupo.

"Aack! What is it?!" the purple haired boy asked frantically. "Are you hurt? Is someone bullying you? What's-"

"I found you!" Gumi chimed, squeezing him in a hug. "I thought I never would! It's just- I- I don't know what I would've done if you were missing from my life!" She bawled into Gakupo's shoulder.

The other table members gave Gumi a weirded out look as Gakupo muttered, "Drama queen."

Soon, Teto and Ruko arrived at the table as well, conversing about how gross cafeteria food is. Eventually, nearly everyone was crowded around the cafeteria table eating.

Tenten made her way to the cafeteria, glancing around for a familiar face. She was greeted with the sight of Naruto and Lee arguing at one of the tables, Sakura sitting to Naruto's left and looking like she was about to punch something. Skipping to the table, she took a seat next to the pinkette, "Heyo!"

"Oh, thank goodness you're here, Tenten… I was getting sick of listening to these idiots..."

"UGH! SO MANY SMELLS!" The little group looked up to see Kiba wrinkling his nose in disgust and rubbing it as he walked towards them, plopping down across from Tenten and placing his face on the table. Sakura poked his forehead, "Haha, must suck for you." Kiba growled an incoherent response.

"Where's Shikamaru and Hinata-chan?" Lee asked, standing on the table and looking around.

"Sit down, Lee!" the pinkette cried, shoving him back into his seat. "They'll be here soon."

Sure enough, the navy-haired girl and pineapple haired boy rounded the corner, conversing with one another.

"Hey, Hina-chan, guess what?" Tenten cried happily as the girl sat next to her.

"Wh-what?"

"I gave your 'crush' a bloody nose in P.E.!"

"Y-you wh-what?" the pale-eyed girl stuttered. "Yeah, I nailed him in the face with a dodgeball!" the brunette continued cheerfully.

"What's this about nailing someone in the face with a dodgeball?" a soft voice chimed. Tenten looked towards the source of the voice, grinning. "Haku! I haven't seen you at all today!" The boy in front of Tenten had long dark brown hair and deep chocolate eyes; two thick strands of his hair were hanging from loose ties over his shoulder and the rest was pulled into a bun atop his head. He wore a uniform consisting of a male top and female bottom. The boy sat next to Shikamaru, pulling out his own lunch, "I've had a lot of classes with Ino-chan."

As if on cue, said blonde came barreling down the hall and into the cafeteria, squealing about some cute couple she'd just passed. She rocketed into the seat next to Hinata and began shaking the poor girl's arm, babbling on and on about the scene.

"Sometimes I regret having ever befriended any of you…"

The group glanced up at the speaker; Hyuuga Neji stood behind Lee, grimacing at the sight before him. Lee scootched over closer to the edge and patted the place next to him, "Sit and enjoy lunch with us, Neji!" The Hyuuga grunted before sitting and placing his lunch on the table.

"YES! TIME TO EAT!"

The familiar loud voice caused the former Konoha students to sweatdrop, for they knew exactly who has spoken. "Chouji," Shikamaru sighed, "just sit down and eat… troublesome…" The plump boy slid into the seat next to Haku and immediately began to shovel food into his mouth.

Tenten sighed and rolled her eyes. She sat up straighter and gazed around, realizing that there was one person missing from their group, "Where's Gaara?"

Chouji looked up from his barbeque, the swirls on his cheeks coated with sauce, "He was headed up to the roof last I saw him."

The brunette sighed. "I'm gonna go drag his butt down here… Naruto, don't touch my lunch!" she exclaimed, standing up and popping her knuckles as she made her way back into the hallway.

"Miku's not here," Ruko noticed.

"Maybe we're better off that way," Teto said, shrugging as she chomped on her favorite French bread.

"Yeah, but I'm gonna go look for her," Ruko replied, getting up from her seat.

Big Al finished his hamburger briskly, standing up as well. "I have to go to the bathroom, so I'll come with you." He dropped his trash into the trashcan, and the two walked into the hall.

They parted after going through the main hall, Ruko searching for Miku and Big Al searching for a bathroom.

After exiting the restroom, Al began to make his way back to the cafeteria. He heard footfalls in the distance, making him curious, so he peeked down another hall, where the staircase was. _Funny… Everyone should be at lunch._ He crossed over to the stairs, climbing them two at a time out of habit. On the second floor, he found a lost looking Tenten. He debated whether or not to call out for her, but instead of talking, he decided to just follow her. He was done with his lunch, and he had nothing better to do. Might as well.

"Stairs to the roof… Stairs to the roof… Stairs to the roof…" the girl murmured to herself over and over as she peeked in every nook and cranny.

"Why are you looking for the roof?" Big Al asked, stepping forward. He tucked his hands in his pockets, tilting his head to the left.

"AIYAA!" the brunette squealed, recoiling and instinctively throwing a piece of liquorice at him as if it were a kunai.

He caught the piece of candy in between his thumb and pointer finger, popping it in his mouth. "Thanks for the candy," he said, winking playfully. "But really, why aren't you at lunch?" He looked down at his feet. "Can I, uh, have another piece of licorice?"

Tenten crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes at him. "Firstly, I'm looking for my friend who my other friend said he saw go up to the roof." She walked up to him, arms still crossed, "Second…" She swung back her arm and whacked him in the side, "Don't startle me like that!" Finally, she reached into her pocket and pulled out a packet of the sweet candy, taking a piece out and waving it in front of his face, "Third, sure."

"First, oh. Second, ow! And third, thanks. Need help looking? Which friend is it?" He took the licorice strip, put it in his mouth leaving it dangling from his lips, and rubbed where he was smacked. That made it nearly the fifth time she nearly murdered him…

"Gaara, the one from P.E.; I volunteered to drag his raccoon-eyed butt back down to the cafeteria," she replied turning away from him and walking down the hall a ways. "Only problem is, I don't know where you'd access the roof, and that's where Chouji saw him headed." She stuck another strand of the candy in her mouth, nibbling at it as she continued to glance around.

"Maybe it's this way?" Al pointed at a hallway that he had never noticed before. "I think we should go this way." He walked over towards the hall, waiting to see if she would follow.

Tenten shrugged, "You're the one that's been here before so whatever." She reluctantly trailed behind, wondering whether she really needed his help or not.

"Actually, I've never been to the roof before. Heck, I didn't even _know_ you could get to the roof." He paced around until he came across a door labeled "roof". "Maybe this is it!" he exclaimed, throwing it open. 

As light flooded the hallway, Tenten ducked around him and ran out. "Sunlight!" she cried dramatically, her hands thrown into the air.

As expected, a familiar red-head was crouched on the flat surface, staring at the sky. A small brown bird was perched on his shoulder, occasionally picking at the cookies on Gaara's lap.

"Gaara~!" she sang, glomping the poor boy. " We found you~ We found- YOU MADE ME LOOK ALL OVER THE SCHOOL FOR YOU! I GOT LOST!"

The red-head flinched ever so slightly as the brunette practically screamed in his ear. "Whatever," he replied cooly. Tenten huffed and crossed her arms before declaring, "We're going to take you back to the cafeteria!"

She grabbed his left arm and turned back towards the door.

"Tenten, what are you-let go of me."

"C'mon, Al! Grab his other arm and help me drag him!"

"H-Huh? But can't he get up himse- Oh, fine." Big Al gripped Gaara's arm, but ended up hoisting him on his shoulder. "Okay, let's go!" With that, they joyfully went back to the cafeteria.

That was one of those moments when the two actually got along.

When they arrived back at the cafeteria, Al set Gaara back onto his feet so he could go back to his table.

"Alrighty. See you." Al strode back over to his table, leaving Tenten standing there.

"You made it back alive!" Kaito cheered.

"Yeah."

"Long pee," Gakupo said.

Big Al rolled his eyes. "I didn't take that long. I had to help that girl find Gaara." He let out a little chuckle thinking about it.

"Huh. Didn't know you cared about her," Luka smirked.

And that ended the short amount of time Al was feeling decent towards Tenten.

"I do _not_ care about her!" Big Al's face grew heated as he slammed his palm against the table, standing up in the process. Seeing how the table had quieted, Al cleared his throat and sat back down. "Ahem... Yeah."

"I wonder where Ruko and Miku are?" Ritsu pondered, tapping his chin thoughtfully.

"Eh, I don't know. Probably complaining about life somewhere." Len took a bite of banana.

Rin, meanwhile, was staring at the newbies' table.

"Rin, what're you looking at?" Len asked.

"That boy's sniffing the table," Rin answered, gesturing towards the boy with the red triangles on his cheeks.

Now everyone's attention was turned towards their table.

"That Lee guy's doing jumping jacks on the table..."

"Is that other dude still eating?"

"That raccoon-eyed kid has some kind of gourd on his back."

"D-Don't judge, guys... I'm sure p-people thing the s-same about us..." Meiko stuttered.

"Good point. Hey, you could be good friends with that Hinata girl! She's kind of all shy, too!" Gumi clapped happily.

Everyone shrugged and turned back to busy themselves with their food.

"One hundred twenty-seven… One hundred twenty-eight… One hundred twenty-"

"Get off the table, Lee."

"Ah, Sakura-chan, I am only performing necessary training-"

" _Get. Off. The. Table."_

"A-Ah… _H-hai,_ Sakura-chan…"

The students around the table let out a collective sigh of relief as Lee slid back into his seat.

"Hey, Lee, isn't that the 'unyouthful' girl you were telling us about?" Haku asked, pointing towards the teal-haired girl now making her way into the cafeteria.

"Ugh, I don't want to sit with the freaks at your- okay, fine. I have nowhere else to sit," sighed Miku to Ruko, crossing her arms, facing Ruko, who was right next to her.

"That's what I thought," Ruko smirked.

Lee blinked, glancing in the direction of Haku's finger, "Oh! Yes, that's her! HELLO, UNYOUTHFUL MAIDEN!" He stood on the bench, waving.

"Yipe! It's _him!_ " Miku seethed, glaring in his direction and putting her hands on her hips. Leeaning towards him, she added, "What do YOU want?"

Lee frowned, then grinned, "I just thought you should know that your butt looks a bit unyouthful~."

Miku let out a scoff. "I'll have you know my butt is perfect just the way it is! Now, YOUR butt, we should talk about." She crossed her arms angrily.

"Yes, talk about how youthful and amazing it is," the ebony haired teen replied, slapping his buttocks.


	2. Chapter 2

OKay so, basically, this is never going to be updated again. I just published this because I wanted to, really. I may reorganize this into proper chapters because it's an unorganized, unproofed mess and it's probably a headache to read. It was based on an (EXTREMELY OOC) RP Vi and I did way back when, and we, for some reason, loved shipping characters that made no sense. Like, Big Al and Tenten. WHY Big Al and Tenten? Who knows. Just accept it. There's obviously a buttload of stuff that doesn't make any sense whatsoever. Like the Rock Lee and Miku dance-off. I just remember laughing my ass off at imagining that while writing it, tbh. Good times. Also this thing is about 34 pages btw, way longer than it probably SHOULD be

Anyway if you actually read that I'm honestly truly really happy? Looking back at it it wasn't THAT poorly written, if I'm being honest, and it's just fun for me and the friend that wrote it with me to look back at it and remember what dorks we were in middle school, and to immortalize it on the Internet. Fun fact- we tried to do a dramatic reading of it once at like 2 in the morning and tried to record it but the recording ended up being two hours of us making stupid comments- I don't think we really ended up reading the thing at all. Anyway I just wanted to upload this second "chapter" to add an author's note n stuff, but that's pretty much all I have to say!


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